The Greatest Author

This is a poem I wrote some time ago, which I just found and deemed worthy of posting. 

The Greatest Author
By Melody Beerbower, May 4, 2012

There is one author 
I’d dearly love to meet.
The greatest author ever
To write upon a sheet.

He is more clever than P. G. Woodhouse
More timeless than William Shakespeare
More moral than Aesop and his fables 
More historic than Paul Revere.

More mysterious than Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
More morose than Edgar Allen Poe
More classic than Mark Twain
More numskull than Larry, Curly, and Moe.

More poetic than Robert Frost
More faulty than Charles Darwin 
More read than Louisa May Alcott
More accurate than Isaac Newton

More original than Homer
More wise than Benjamin Franklin
More quotable than C. S. Lewis 
More renown than Charles Dickens

Yet, we know almost nothing about him,
This writer from the abyss.
We don’t even know his name,
For he is Anonymous.  

A song for Abby's Birthday

This is a song I wrote in honor of Abby's birthday. It's not the best, but at least I'm not writing about your nose like did for your brother's song.

All that to say, Happy Birthday Abby, and here's your song--my first, and probably not last, Veggietale parody.

A Song for Abby's Birthday
By Melody Beerbower, Oct. 10, 2013

A girl was born not so long ago, her memory's quite dear
She had a birthday (Please shout hurray!) like most people do each year.
And people wished her Birthday Cheer, All Happiness-- the lot
They told her on the day (in a special way)
But somehow I forgot
So-oooooo...

I wrote this song for you for birthday
It's a little sappy and several days past due.
But if I sing this song for your birthday,
It's sure to make all your dreams come true.
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-lee-eee-ooo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yada-yada yada-yada yad-eee-ooo

(In case you were wondering, I did not put as many verses in as there are in the original song. My inspiration ran out.)